best straight-man friend
You know how a woman’s (latest) best accessory is a (male) gay best-friend? Well… I want a best straight-man friend.
You know, someone who’s reliable and dependable (OK, girls, hold your tongues). Someone to confide in, some who understands (girls, continue holding). Someone who is big and strong and who would come a calling when I cry for help - which would be often. Someone with muscled, preferably hairy (so, I’m kinky), arms to give me warm comforting hugs. Someone with solid but comfy shoulders to lean on when my days are blue, and when they are black, to cry on.
Someone who is a Mr D.I.Y. and who can fix things when they inevitably go wrong. Someone who’ll relieve me of the stress and burden of practical problems and take it upon themselves to solve it for me, well… at least help with a large of part it anyway. Someone who’ll sooth my pain when I hurt and tell me that things are going to be alright (even though, he knows very well they wouldn’t be). Someone who’ll take me out and cheer me up, and show me a good time.
Someone who knows that sometimes all I want is just to be held and hugged.
Someone who is good looking and attractive who I can take out on nights when I need a “partner” for social occassions. Someone who’s confident of himself, and understands, and doesn’t mind playing the role. Someone I can flirt with, and who’ll flirt back, because we both “know” that no harm will come of it… unless he’s completely inebriated and I take advantage of the situation to blow him off… which he’ll no doubt enjoy and then pretend it never happened. Until the next time!
Because sometimes, all you really want is a friend and confidant with whom you can have fun and on whom you can rely without all the stress and burden, not to mention complication, of a sexual relationship.
Oh. Only serious applicants need comment in this post.
Posted on August 3rd, 2004 by jl
Filed under: Life's Gay, Old Blog
I would volunteer but I’m taken!
Cheers!
HAHa funny vernon, this is a handbag position not a relationship! :p you know my number jikon!
Why would you need “good-looking and attractive” if you’re only looking for a friend? Would you still be able to keep your hands off? Hehheh
Rizal: “handbag position” - that’s a new one. very good too.
James: err… i think that’s the point! but also, just as women want gay men friends to pretend to be their date on unbearable stuffy social occassions, it wouldn’t hurt to sometimes have a good looking bloke to show off, even if under false pretences, at dinners, weddings, cocktail parties… etc. etc. care to volunteer?!? i promise i wouldn’t tell mae…!
Pity I’m not good looking.
I’ll settle for being friends, though.
Besides, I’m horrible at social gatherings.
>)
not good looking?!? hmm… i believe i’ve seen otherwise…
Thats quite a wish list you have there. Men who perform these functions are husbands, boyfriends or carpets. All exact a payment in one form or another. Husbands expect sex, childcare, food & cleaning for performing these services, boyfriends expect some of what a husband expects & carpets expect/hope that they’ll be getting some of the above in the future.
Note: Carpets - men who let you walk all over them
you’re looking for a metrosexual! =)
i would offer up my brother, but he doesnt have the physical attributes. and certainly not the DIY tendencies. feh.
Let’s see…. reliable, big, strong, hairy, will come a-calling when you need him … Sounds to me you’re either looking for a boyfriend or an Alsatian.
Why does he have to be straight anyway? At least when you fall in love with him (and yes, you will) there might be some chance of him reciprocating, instead of him driving home to his wife and kids every night.
can i as a non-candidate suggest the actually very good looking ash? *ducks*
Oi! I won’t have rumours going around about Ash being good looking and all that! That’s just not fair to the boy.
Pick on someone else, PY!
>)
oh but oh oh..
am not male but I wanna join the ash fan club also..
how pickyin, how?
oh no. from what i hear, ash, these aren’t rumours…
Ash, I’ve been reading your blog for the last couple of weeks. And I still can’t figure out if you’re Malay, Chinese or Indian, fat or thin, tall or short - I have absolutely no face to put to the words.
I guess that’s the thing about the more introspective, ruminative blogs - you learn a lot about the person inside, but not enough, ironically, about the more superficial stuff.
So Ash, if you’re cute, I demand full stats. Pretty please :o)
And Jikon, no, I’m not hijacking your blog for my own lecherous intentions. At least I don’t think I am.
So, as a hairy-bodied guy I’m only fancied by “kinky” people? Well, I beg to differ… and I mean beg(?)
Mike x
I’m straight…and SOMEONE thought I was gay for a long long time *points to Ash*. Which I still don’t know why that is so because any decent guy would just shut up and pay attention anyway. Unfortunately I’m good for the word of mouth…as I’m far far away from Malaysia…:)
idlan, we can discuss at length over 3 nasi lemaks when you get home. >)
ash - we want photo! photo! photo!
Jikon: Like Chow Yuen Fatt’s God of Gamblers, I don’t take photos of myself.
And I kill those who DO have them.
Jay: Stats? Interesting. I’ll see if I can make some up.
I’ll say one thing tho, with all the attention I need to go back to the gym!
>)
Hahahh!! Unfortunately, Jikon, I hardly qualify given your high standards. Besides, isn’t there this theory that a lot of gays come out after they get married and have kids? I’m on dangerous ground.
Ash: ooo… someone’s going to die very soon. but i’d agree, you could do with a bit of gym work!
just stay away from Fitness First in Maxis, KLCC - gay men central. you just might get raped! ooo.. actually, that would be a good time to take a photo of you!
James: my standards aren’t really that high… just wishful thinking… but yes, remember to call me in 5 years time.
Jikon, damnit, is that where they go? When I went back to KL I went to Wisma SPK and it was like, the boringest workout I’d ever had.
Ash, three letters will keep me happy: VWE
sharizal, I mean taken as a good-looking confidante and friend. :P. Not relationship. I’m a little bothered about flirting back and forth though…there’s always a danger of stepping into forbidden territory if it went overboard…
Jay, that IS right. Oh the bods they have…..
http://bumbung.thebumbung.com/ - i suddenly thought of this guy when reading yr post.
jikon: “just stay away from Fitness First in Maxis, KLCC - gay men central. you just might get raped! ooo.. actually, that would be a good time to take a photo of you!”
Urgh… I’m a member of Summit Fitness First… is that a mini-gay central? Any other gyms with gay activity I should avoid?