Remember that old adage, “be careful of what you wish for, it might come true”?

I’m beginning to have a spell of that…. I don’t want to go into details, for fear of tempting fate, but… after longing so much for so long to be a part of a relationship again, I suddenly find myself starting to mourn the loss of my single-life and my freedom, although nothing has developed to the irrevocable very serious stage as yet…

All of a sudden, I see flashing before me:

• my carefree existence of coming and going as I please;
• the right to sleep with whomever I want whenever I want for whatever flimsy reason I might have - or not, as the case may be;
• the pleasure of being in a “mood” and not having to explain myself;
• the pleasure of doing things and not having to worry about being questioned or chided;
• the freedom to be irresponsible and not having someone moralising over my shoulder;
• etc. etc.

All of a sudden… I am beginning to wonder how much I am giving up for what I may or may not get… Am I ready to let go of my recently rediscovered freedom of being single? Am I ready to plunge into another relationship? Am I ready to open my heart, let someone in and risk being wounded (again?)?

I’m not telling you what’s going on just yet… A successful presentation in the Department and love all in one week is just too good to be true… I do not want to tempt fate… I definitely do not want to risk the wrath of the Gods expressing their displeasure at my revelling in mine…!

So for now, let’s pretend nothing is happening…

Posted on February 20th, 2006 by jl
Filed under: Life!, blah blah, love